Tumblers

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I hate when people don't get my sarcasm because I now sound like a bully - Tumbler
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Your secrets are safe with me. I'm not even listening - Tumbler
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I won't be remembered as a person who keeps their mouth shut - Tumbler
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Apologies for having a great rack and always being right - Tumbler
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Daily reminder some people are here just to test your patience - Tumbler
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Keeping my head high and my middle finger higher - Tumbler
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I can’t turn water into wine but I can turn alcohol into bad decisions and absolute chaos - Tumbler
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I wonder if people look both ways before getting on my fucking nerves - Tumbler
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Apparently, alcohol is not the way to improve staff meetings - Tumbler
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I’m glad that my thoughts don’t appear in speech bubbles over my head - Tumbler
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I’ve tried shutting up. It’s not for me - Tumbler
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I couldn't care less - Tumbler
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Go away. I'm introverting - Tumbler
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I have a very peopley job for a person who doesn’t like people - Tumbler
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The Bags Under My Eyes Are Designer - Tumbler
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I'm Sarcastic Because Punching People Is Frowned Upon - Tumbler
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Good girls go to heaven. Bad ones get spanked - Tumbler
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I wonder how many people listen to me and think if I get psychiatric help - Tumbler
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‘We don’t lick people’ is the biggest lie we tell children - Tumbler
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Being sarcastic and being sincere sounds surprisingly similar - Tumbler
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Being at work is a social experiment testing the limits of my patience and ability to interract with idiots - Tumbler
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You can’t possibly still be shocked by what’s coming out of my mouth - Tumbler
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Poor Planning On Your Part Does Not Constitute An Emergency On Mine Tumbler
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I Wouldn't Have To Manage My Anger If People Managed Their Stupidity - Tumbler
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From the bottom of my heart: I don’t care - Tumbler
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I'm struggling to care and I'm not even sorry - Tumbler
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I'm Not Sarcastic. I'm Just A Funny Person Surrounded By Idiots - Tumbler
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I'm Such A Millennial - Tumbler
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I Swear I Have It All Together. I Just Forgot Where I Put It - Tumbler
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Don't Worry What People Think. They Don't Do It Very Often - Tumbler
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May Contain Alcohol - Tumbler
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I'm Really Not Funny. I'm Just Mean And People Think I'm Joking - Tumbler
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I’m not trying to insult people. I’m just good at describing them - Tumbler
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I have my own circus and my own monkeys. Keep yours away - Tumbler
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Some days my supply of available fucks to give is insufficient for the demand - Tumbler
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Let me check my giveashitometer. Nope, nothing - Tumbler
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I'm too old for this SHIT - Tumbler
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There’s a chance this contains alcohol - Tumbler
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The main cause of stress is daily contact with idiots - Tumbler
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A day without sarcasm probably wouldn’t kill me, but why risk it - Tumbler
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Remember when I asked for your opinion? Nope? Me neither - Tumbler
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Forgive and forget? Nahh... Fuck you and fuck that - Tumbler
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I’m not bossy. I am the boss - Tumbler
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I'm trying to be more positive person every day. Today, I'm positive everyone is a dickhead - Tumbler
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My dog can tell if you are a twat - Tumbler
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I'm sarcastic because telling people to go fuck themselves is apparently rude - Tumbler
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If You Don't Like the Word CUNT, Don't Act Like One - Tumbler
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The path to inner peace begins with four words: Not my fucking problem - Tumbler
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Sometimes I feel like giving up. Then I remember I have a lot of people to piss off - Tumbler
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I need a speed bump between my brain and my mouth - Tumbler
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Be careful. My mouth can hurt your feelings - Tumbler
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I'm running entirely on sarcasm and inappropriate thoughts - Tumbler
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Keep talking... I'm diagnosing you - Tumbler
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When I said 'How stupid can you be?' it wasn't a challenge - Tumbler
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Hating people takes too much energy. I just pretend they are dead - Tumbler
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